I Committed to Myself and Why You Should Too

Let me tell you my experience and how I committed to myself and why you should too.

If you have trouble at work, problems in life, you are feeling unmotivated or you are self-sabotaging your relationships, remember to always commit to yourself. This is the last trigger that happened to me. And it happened today. At work.

8.02 pm Wednesday evening

I started receiving messages from my’ boss’ at the photo studio about having sent wrong images on a clothing site. He accuses me of not having done this and that for quite an hour.

Reality is he has never told me one of these things. But he doesn’t wanna listen. He said we will talk tomorrow.

9.10 am Thursday morning

He starts treating me like I am the worst human being on Earth, not capable of understanding or expressing myself in any way. All of this for mistakes I committed because of him not telling me things.

I tried to talk to him but he doesn’t wanna listen at all. He then replies to me badly because I did the tiniest mistake of not having sent a warning email.

The email wasn’t a priority and it wouldn’t have changed anything in our workflow. So his reaction was totally unnecessary and out of context.

You should know that this environment is going on since June/July. You may remember I talked about my work life here on this post and how I managed not to give up on my mental health.

But let me show you how it ends.

I Committed to Myself and Why You Should Too

My Honest Real-life Experience

It’s not fair to be treated like this. No one should be treated like a total piece of shit for mistakes not of his/her own. But also for mistakes. They can always be solved one way or another.

I am so tired.

Working in such a bad atmosphere for 8 hours every day is mentally and physically unbearable.

I started changing my lifestyle in order to avoid this: I woke up at 5.40 every morning in order to have the time to exercise and meditate.

This helps me in getting mentally positive at work.

But not today.

Today I had enough.

It’s now 10.54 am, he already came checking at my computer to see what I was doing like a witch inquisitor. Is this life?

It’s not the life I want.

I am trying to do my best. Mistakes happen and for me, it’s good sense try to solve them together. What’s the point of being a team? Instead, here it’s more a master-slaves kind of relationship. I am over the moon about it (being sarcastic of course!)

Dear readers, I am not complaining – just analyzing what is going on to try having a clearer idea of my future.

So what’s now?

To be fairly honest, it feels like the universe is putting the pieces of the puzzle together.

Back In July, I survived because I promised myself that around Jan/Feb I would have asked for a part-time job.

(Okay I wanted to quit but everyone around me suggested me to ask for a part-time first – I surprisingly listened).

Now, out of my control, things are happening. And I haven’t changed my mind.

While I photograph or edit images at the photo studio I also spend my time studying and listening to business podcasts.

I have got a fire energy inside which is burning more than ever.

I am an Aries, rising Leo and moon in Capricorn.

Now you can imagine why I can’t stay inside (desk-like kind of job) for too long, do something I am not passionate about for too much time or not creative enough (e-commerce photography) or stay silent when injustice happens.

And today, they all happened at the same time.

Reacting to unfairness

When injustice slams directly or indirectly, my reaction is all or nothing. When somebody hurts me, I forgive but not forget. In these almost 3 years on this job, I have received so many wrongs. Yes, I have made mistakes. But I always did my best to solve them and I succeeded.

Instead, he (my boss) never apologized to me. According to him, he is always right and perfect. I tried multiple times to explain to him my view in order to talk but he explicitly said he didn’t wanna listen.

How should I treat such mere people?

My opinion of them is done: they are horrible people. And not just at work.

They talk at your back, make fun of you and say to you smiling ‘well, maybe photography isn’t the right field for you’ or ‘you’re here because you had a friend inside, so you don’t deserve your position‘.

They try to push you down in this subtle way.

But who are they to get you down?

Since July I started treating them like they deserved. I value them zero and I don’t make them tear me down anymore.

I am fully committing to myself. So let me explain why you should too.

what I am wearing: Alyx baby-x bag / FemmeLuxe* Camel Coat / Nike Cortez / Pull&Bear Pants

More suggestions for outfits like these. Check the best bodysuits and the amazing corset tops to go alongside long coats. Also, this selection of co-ords is super interesting.

I commit to myself

What does this mean? I decided to put myself first. I committed to myself.

For once, I am trying to listen to my needs, not somebody else’s or what is right. In order to start my own business and do the life I dream of, I need to focus on myself.

Meaning I need to find space and time for studying, self-care, nurturing myself, avoid burn out and be the most productive ever.

Toxic places and people are by any mean pushed away. I don’t need them and if you are in a similar situation, you don’t need them.

Truly, you have everything you need within yourself.

You are strong and unique.

Don’t forget it.

Don’t let them tear you down.

It is such a waste of time listening to these people because they don’t make you grow.

They don’t say anything interesting and they don’t critique for making you grow up but as a way to satisfy their inner ego.

This is wrong. Don’t consider them. Don’t let them come near you if you can. If you can’t, mentally repeat to yourself all the great things you accomplished.

Don’t forget how much you worth.

It’s okay to feel down but never ever forget how much value you are.
At work, in life and love.

Photography is therapeutic

I firmly believe that photography and art are therapeutic. You can commit to yourself with them. When you’re feeling down, creating something liberates your mind. Photography is so powerful because it can also empower you.

How so? A photograph is magical. Seeing yourself in a picture captures that moment. You in that precise moment.

Portraits are so difficult because they can catch someone’s soul. The picture of Dorian Gray coming alive if you think about it. But it is so damn positive. Seeing your reflection which maybe who you want to be is a very powerful tool.

And anyone can create it.

Or at least try.